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Laya Sasikumar |
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Is Feminism being left on the shelf? |
Emmeline Pankhurst would turn in her grave if she knew the women’s rights she’d so desperately fought for were being forgotten by 21st century women. Admit you’re a feminist in today’s world is seen as revealing your dark-side, almost as though announcing you’re Hitler’s love-child. Admit you’re a feminist in the Asian community, and you may as well be destined for a life of spinsterhood. Clear out that mango chutney and pickle, and make space for yourself as a permanent fixture on the shelf.
The very essence of the Women’s Rights movement seems to have been forgotten over the years. The modern day movement in the UK can be traced back as far as 1832 when Mary Smith, an unmarried property-owner, petitioned for the right for propertied women to be able to vote for members of Parliament. Although she pretty much got laughed out of Parliament, it paved the way for the ‘Suffragette Movement’, enabling British women to have the vote by 1918 (but with restrictions of course).
These were forward-thinking women who were fighting for equality and justice. Their strength of character in taking on the misogynist mentality is a sharp contrast to the image of hairy bra-burning individuals that the word feminist appears to conjure up today.
As a student I had to make a choice on my history modules. It was either between a ‘Women’s History’ module or a military history of the ‘Cold War’. Not really one for strategies and war tactics (I had enough of that playing on our unsuccessful netball team) I decided on taking the latter. I felt empowered and strong and with ‘Destiny’s Child’s’ ‘Independent Woman’ playing in my head I thought I’d be surrounded by like-minded twenty-year olds embracing the sisterhood. How wrong could I have been?
My tutor, a blonde haired Helen Mirren look-alike who was in her fifties was everything I’d expected in a ‘Women’s Right’s’ historian. Strong, articulate and feisty, I had images of her marching through campus as a student campaigning for equality and justice. But that was where my naïve day-dreams ended. The hostile responses from the other twenty-something girls was a shock to the system.
‘They (the feminists) make us (the new generation of women) feel worthless if we pick a family life over a career’ said one girl.
‘Exactly, a lot of the time the Germaine Greer’s of the world are just aggressive, bitter women with a massive chip on their shoulder’, said another ‘sister’.
I could tell from the look of disappointment on my tutor’s face the thoughts that must have been running thorough her mind. Had it been a waste of time marching and campaigning for all those years? A right which is now just being taken fore granted by the ‘modern’ woman. The whole point and message of the ‘Women’s Rights’ movement appears to have been misinterpreted over the years. Feminists campaigned for freedom and choice. If it hadn’t been for the likes of the Pankhurst’s, women wouldn’t be sitting in university tutorials discussing these very issues in the first place. Feminism has enabled women to have a choice to have a family or pursue a career or in some cases do both. It hasn’t emasculated the female of the species, but celebrated the strength of what women can bring to an other-wise male-dominated world. It isn’t prompting women to abandon femininity, take on male traits and become man-haters, but rather recognise the differences and embrace what women have to offer and can bring to the world. After all as the saying goes, isn’t the hardest job the responsibility of raising a family – and who is it behind every great man, oh yes that’s right it’s a woman.
Fortunately I’ve been surrounded by strong female role models in my family and have always been encouraged to think for myself and form my own opinion. But that’s not to say that my extended family agrees. I remember visiting family friends, and the ‘natural’ separation occurred of men sitting and talking in the living room, whilst the women congregated in the kitchen. But it was getting interesting in the living room, with my dad launching the debate on British politics. Having been bought up in the small southern state of Kerala, Indian politics has always been a prevalent theme in family discussions. My dad was involved in politics from a young age, as were most Malayalee children.
“ See the problem with British politics today” says my dad, “ is that there’s no difference between the Labour or Tory party – you vote for one you may as well vote for the other. Labour should still be a party for the working class.”
“ Yes but there’s no such thing as class now, so that’s why Labour are loosing its supporters ”, my ‘uncle’ chimed in.
At this point I thought I’d contribute.
“ Of course class still exists, you only have to look around you. Maybe not as obvious as in the past, but it still exists”, I said.
My dad, who has always taught both me and my brother to speak out not shut up, nodded his head at me proudly. But just as quickly as I acknowledged his nod I was transported back to the exam room as my ‘uncle’ continued to test my knowledge on class system in Britain in the twenty-first century. At the end of the discussion he looked at me and said “ Laya you have too many opinions – this isn’t good you know.”
That one line summarised many of the fears associated with feminism in the Asian community. A woman with an opinion, a woman with a mind of her own is a woman who wouldn’t respect her husband, therefore someone who would most definitely stay unmarried and left on the shelf. An Asian woman can have opinions, but only after getting married.
Maybe this is a slight exaggeration, but it appears to be a view shared among many Asian men, and to an extent by Asian women too. How many times have you come across women who dumb themselves down to be liked and appreciated? The point women seem to forget is that some of the strongest women have come out of the Asian community. In 1966, India had a strong and confidant female prime minister in Indira Gandhi over two decades before Maggie Thatcher was plotting a war in the Falklands. Sarojini Naidu and Aruna Asaf Ali were instrumental in sustaining support for the independence movement in India and Pakistan in 1947, and Aung San Suu Kyi has been a strong and central figure in Burma’s pro-democracy movement.
These female leaders were also wives and mothers with strong family lives, but that’s not to say that they couldn’t also be strong independent women. They proved that you don’t have to compromise between family life and independence. The lessons of feminism shouldn’t be warped in our minds. Feminism isn’t about emasculation it is about the freedom of choice, without which we wouldn’t be able to having this very discussion.
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